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modestmgmtofficial:

everything’s so funny when u use the wrong measurement:

  • 5 gallons of homework
  • mouthful of lint
  • 20 degrees of facial oil
  • 7 pints of china
  • handful of fergi
  • 60 mph of dad

60 mph of dad

(via thymegatampon)

nun: pastor, we are having trouble with the exorcism
pastor: have you tried unblessing and blessing again ?
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Anonymous: your fav childhood memory?

ageekyfemmeforeveringlasses:

Not paying bills

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